Smiling

Happy

Full of enjoyment

All is well

and on and on go the images that we share and see on social media sites.

But are they really all those things that the images are showing?

As a parents and caregivers of children with special needs, we know just hard our kids work in their lives. To do the things that others can do with little or no effort.

And we know how hard WE work to help these beautiful people succeed at life.

It is not easy, I will be the first to say it. But I will also be the first to say, that my daughter, Elizabeth is worth it all and more.

With that being said, I can’t help but see the posts and images and for a moment wonder just how true to real life they are.

I know that there is such an uptick in anxiety and depression. Some experts say it is related to social media and the emotions that it creates in the viewer. Life is always perfect/better/wonderful.

I think something I do when I see a particularly perfect post is to look at one of the pictures I have of Elizabeth and think about the backround to that picture.

To look behind the image

Was it a good day? or just a good moment?

What happened before this picture?

What occurred right after?

It is like in the one movie about emotions where they show that the emotions of happy and sad can occur at the same time. Maybe that is the same kind of thing here. Elizabeth can be smiling at that moment but then feel overwhelmed right after.

I offer this:

Remember to look behind the images. Know that you are doing a good job and that the posts showing perfect are not true. Maybe for the moment, but let it in that it is not the reality all the time.

As we work so hard for our kids, it is hard to wonder if it is enough or why the goals we have just aren’t getting met fast or well enough. It is not made easier by hold up the mirror to social media and allowing a tug at your heart to occur.

Remember to look behind the images: trust that a captured moment in time is just that.

We all need to support each other in this journey with special needs that we are on and I felt that this was something on my mind. My daughter is 25 now, so I can’t go back in time to try this or that therapy. But what I can do is be proud of how far she has come and trust me, I really am.

But if I was a young mom to Elizabeth and I saw the social media posts that are everywhere, I feel I would have been dropped to my knees.

So I share this to help those who may tear up at a post or image.

Trust you in what you are doing and

Remember to look behind the image.

I wish everyone a peaceful week.

Michele Gianetti author of Elizabeth Believes in Herself.

/I can remember leaving the school at the end of a school year with young Elizabeth

And beginning the transition to summer.

As we did this, I was excited for summer but also aware of the fact that we had many things to work on. Things that were clearly listed on the IEP. The very IEP that we had probably signed off on a mere month prior.

We had reading, writing and math goals to work on as well as working on her speech and language skills. For those who may not know, my daughter Elizabeth has 2 disorders. They are SPD (sensory processing disorder) and global dyspraxia and she was non-verbal until she was 5 years old.

So her IEP was chock ful of things we could work on during the days. Not in a therapy kind of way, more in an everything-with-a -purpose kind of way.

The summer took its own pace as they tend to do.

June moves to July and we do our days, working on goals as we can.

And then, every so often, there would be something that she did for the first time. Maybe it was a new skill or maybe a skill done Just that much better than before or maybe it was a new word.

And I would think Did she just say that?!?!? Woohoo! I would think next.

And I was so certain that I would remember this. or the new thing she did or the new thing she did better.

But the truth is, with summer as busy as it typically is, I would kind of make a mental note of it and find myself struggling to remember the complete details for my records. The records that I would include in my introduction letter to Elizabeth’s new teacher at the start of the year.

Truth is, these things do matter….alot, in my opinion, I mean think about all the things that our kids can learn in the summer.

Things they didn’t know at the end of the year prior.

So something I started doing was to keep a record of all of these things I just mentioned. Sometimes it was in a journal that I use to write about events such birthdays or other special occasions and other times it was in a simple spiral notebook.

The point is to make sure to take that one moment and write it down. Date, and what they did.

It will really help you as you meet, talk to and help the new teacher learn about how your child works.

I think as summer flows along, so many little things can get lost.

So the next time you find yourself saying Did they just say that?

Take a moment enjoy the new thing

Then take a moment to write it down.

I promise you that come fall, you will be so glad that you did.

I wish everyone a peaceful week.

Michele Gianetti author of Elizabeth Believes in Herself