When you are in the world of special needs there are times that you have a nice clear path. Say that you know your child will be entering a preschool program. Or you know that you have found a speech therapist who will begin working with your child.

That is nice, a plan

Then there are the many, many times that you sort of know you are on a path, but you really feel adrift Maybe there are issues at the school or that new speech therapist? Well, she isn’t really meshing with your child.

That is when your plan unravels

That is when, in my opinion, as a parent or caregiver to an individual with special needs, you can feel so very lost, and sort of anchorless. And you get to action to fix it all.

I know that on our journey with our daughter, Elizabeth, I have had my emotions run that gamete. From places of certainty to places of complete confusion. Sometimes in all in a day.

For those who don’t know, my daughter, Elizabeth has special needs. She has SPD ( Sensory Processing Disorder) and Global Dyspraxia as well as an auditory processing disorder. These disorders are complex, and are different for each individual who has them. These disorders affect her, each day, everyday. In all she does really.

But let’s be honest, it is hard to get those who work with our children to GET them. And not just GET them. REALLY GET THEM. So much so, that on a day that they are struggling, they will know the WHY of it and how to help them. And will NOT write a note home asking us why this or that behavior was present today. Or asking us to have “Elizabeth stop hiding behind a chair and join the circle time”

So for us, it was learning how to help others understand our daughter and her needs.

And it was not easy then and it is still not easy now. But we do it.

Just like you.

Everyday

But just as I have learned to become a strong advocate for my daughter, I have learned the value and complete need for self-care.

Self Care is Essential

It can look like a walk each day or a cup of coffee with a friend.

It can look like a few minutes in the morning to say prayers or meditate.

It can look like ordering your favorite take out one night instead of cooking.

But the point is you are worth it and you need to care for yourself and not feel bad about doing it.

In the world of special needs and the crazy emotions we feel, sometimes it is finding the familiar, the friend, the coffee shop you love, your favorite Bible reading or your favorite dinner that can bring comfort, help you really exhale for a moment and regroup before you go back into the fight.

I know for me exercise is one of my big self care things. I was biking last week and I was sort of going a bit longer of a ride and turned down a street that had a big hill on it. I hadn’t been on this street in a long time but I remembered that if I could make it up the hill there were 2 blue lines (marking either a gas line or something) at the very top of the hill.

When I got to the 2 blue lines, I KNEW I would be ok because I knew where I was and that I would have the energy to get home.

Sometimes it is just falling back on something familiar that brings you comfort that can make you feel like you will be ok.

Self care is that something.

I wish everyone a peaceful week.

Michele Gianetti author of Elizabeth Believes in Herself.