It all started with a slight turn to the left.
It was only a moment.
And only a small turn.
But I felt a pull in my left knee. I thought no big deal, I will just ignore it.
But I couldn’t because the little pull turned into a small pain then a big pain. So much so that I found myself moving so slowly as I did all the things I do in a day. I had to plan out my steps, account for changes in direction, slopes on any and all walking surfaces and let’s not even talk about the planning that went into coming down the stairs.
I found myself really focusing on this knee as I did my days and I found myself moving so deliberately and quite slowly. The one day as I attempted to shop for groceries, I watched as others seemed to zoom past me and I started to think about how my forced focus on my knee and motor planning it took to do anything. As well as the frustration I felt not being able to do things quickly while watching others do well reminded me of what Elizabeth most likely feels due to her global dyspraxia.
Dyspraxia makes performing motor skills difficult. From the planning of the steps needed to do a task to the organizing the steps to the actual performing the skill, dyspraxia complicates it all. Some people are affected in a small amount others, like Elizabeth are affected globally. So that fine motor skills (writing), gross motor skills(catching a ball) and oral motor (speaking) are affected. And just for added fun, it also has many hidden signs as well.
I think that because I have been with her since birth ( insert smile emoji here) and have worked with her in therapies and life, that I have an decent idea of her disorders and how they make her feel. But truthfully, I cannot as I am not her or living her day.
But the thing is even if I have a taste of it, with luck and time, my knee will heal and I can resume my frenetic paced shopping. But for Elizabeth, she will not have this grace as her disorders do not go away. Nor will the others who have special needs, most likely.
We all get caught up in life. What we need to do for our special children as well as our neurotypical ones, if that applies, for our families, jobs etc. that we may and I include myself here, not really think about how hard our special children are working just to “do a day” We can be cleaning up from dinner and not realize how hard holding the silverware really was for them, or even trying to enjoy a new food due to sensory issues ((Elizabeth has those as well as part of her sensory processing disorder, SPD, diagnosis)
With the holidays coming up and all the added stress to us all, I am thinking I want to take a moment and keep a bit of perspective for Elizabeth as we enter a party or make plans… Maybe more than I typically would have.
I hate my knee injury, but like the thoughts it created in me.
I, to am adjusting and learning on our journey and wanted to share because of that.
I wish everyone a peaceful week.
Michele Gianetti author of:
I Believe In You: A Mother and Daughter’s Special Journey
Elizabeth Believes in Herself: The Special Journey Continues
Special Needs Essentials Blog 