If I asked you what day it was, what would you say? I think I would have to ask one of my children who would look on their phones and report the answer back to me.
I, myself, find our living so surreal.
We all typically love being home, but find ourselves seeing our home as a shelter from “the virus”
We typically love being together as a family but now find ourselves mostly seeing only each other’s faces.
In our state, spring is just arriving. So that means the trees are starting to bloom, the flowers are starting to show themselves. It all looks so pretty and full of life, which contrasts directly with what is going on in our world.
With the change of seasons comes a mental list of all the things that spring brings THAT WE CANNOT DO. It is like we have to reorient that list because the backdrop to our Shelter in Place has changes. In the last month, we have gotten used to understanding our new, temporary I pray, normal. But there is something about spring arriving that brings brightness and hope and immediately requires my brain to say…
WAIT!, REMEMBER YOU CAN’T…..insert spring related item here…..
This change in thinking is something that Elizabeth and I are talking about as we walk. I know that she is feeling the same things that everyone else is because she asked me when the pool will open….so I am using our walk times to keep the chatting going. I think for us, this kind of talking/communicating is helpful because it is helps Elizabeth adjust what she thinks should now be happening with our continued reality.
We talk about feelings, make a list of the things we want to do when we are permitted, the fun she will have at work with her friends, later. We talk because each day for Elizabeth brings feelings that I am learning NEED to be talked about today.
Then again tomorrow.
And the next day.
And the next day.
With Elizabeth’s special needs, talking about what to expect helps her make that mental transition more smoothly as well as vents her frustrations. Her sensory processing disorder ( SPD) and its resulting anxiety can become a big player in her days, so talking about what to expect and how to adjust can help lower that anxiety.
I keep telling myself that I know I am always mentally recalculating life and it is hard work!! Let alone the special needs that our children face added in to the mix.
Since we cannot make the world fit the needs/wants of our special needs child, it is like we have to help them, as best we can, to understand and work with the world we all find ourselves deeply entrenched in.
I will share that Elizabeth’s telehealth last week went really well. I have notes from Mary from it, that I need to make the brain space to process. I will do it soon, but I cannot say exactly when. We all know, life with a special needs child takes a lot of work minus this pandemic but becomes whole thing with it. I also know we will always do our level best for these beautiful special children that we have!
So Corona day 24 is bringing in a new level of reality, maybe a bit more permanence as we leave one season behind and enter a new one.
Please stay safe and stay home if you can!
Michele Gianetti author of:
I Believe In You: A Mother and Daughter’s Special Journey
Emily’s Sister
Elizabeth Believes In Herself: The Special Journey Continues
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