Archives for posts with tag: Friends

Ohio has opened.

Haircuts are being done, we can go to the gym and of course, out to eat as of the 22nd.

So we have haircuts scheduled for May 30th, we always worked out at home and have no plans to head to a restaurant until we see how emotions sort of shake out here regarding the virus, masks, sanitizing  and social distancing.

I have spent a lot of time this week talking to Elizabeth about what social distancing means and why she has to wear a mask around stores, coffee shops and when she is with friends.  I think one of the hardest parts for Elizabeth is that seeing the masks reminds her of THE VIRUS.  And it reminds her that it is still here.  This is where her sensory processing disorder (SPD) comes into play.

I think like anything else with Elizabeth and her special needs, how something is initially presented is really critical.  With her global dyspraxia, how something is initially inputed is critical because things become habits quickly and once the habit is formed it is REALLY hard to change it.  So, making sure she understands all that she needs to do to be safe, is vital.

I think for those of you who have younger children developing a social story about these things that they will see, have to do and experience will really help them process.  For us, we start talking or communicating as early as possible to allow for time to talk again and again as well as answer questions and make concrete plans, such as laying out her mask choices and labeling her container of sanitizer.

This pandemic has really challenged us all and for those who simply wish to answer your child’s question of “when can I see my friend” I have to share that we got to answer Elizabeth’s question with the answer “On Tuesday!”

You see, one of Elizabeth’s friends also happens to be her former adapted PE teacher and the same friend who she works with at one of her internships.  She came over to workout with Elizabeth in person instead of virtually as she had been doing twice a week for over a month.

Elizabeth was very, very, VERY happy.

To see her friend.

In person.

I have to say that it was pretty great to be able to look at Elizabeth and see her eyes so bright and be able to say to her “See honey, we said we would do this again.  That is would just take time.”

They had a great workout  outside in the sun together, while maintaining social distancing and Elizabeth and I made sure that the sanitizer was out on the chair.

They used it and when they came in Elizabeth washed her hands and knew she was not able to hug her friend goodbye, so she just waved.

It was a success.  The work we did helped to make it all work out well.

The first visit in our new normal.

I will take it.

I hope you all are well and safe.

Michele Gianetti  author of:

I Believe In You: A Mother and Daughter’s Special Journey

Emily’s Sister

Elizabeth Believes In Herself: The Special Journey Continues

I was having a discussion with a new friend the other day.  It was about the topic of friends, the need for good ones and the ever growing number of social media “friends”.  In the conversation, I told him about my three very close friends.

You know the ones you can call and not even say hi before you launch into the reason you  are calling.

The ones who know your life and world so well that you don’t have to give any back round information before telling them a new thing.

Yes! those friends.

And I am grateful for them.

Having a child with special needs can be so very isolating. While others are at the park with their children, you are in a therapy session. Or a birthday party is NOT fun for you because you are on pins and needles just waiting for your child to meltdown from the noise or activity.  My daughter Elizabeth has special needs, for those who do not know, she has global dyspraxia and sensory processing disorder (SPD).

So we did feel isolated.

And sometimes I guarded myself against a new friend for fear they would not or could not really understand.  In the early years, maybe I did not truly give those people a fair chance but it was probably because of my need to protect Elizabeth and if I am being truthful, myself too!

I did not want to see the sad looks or hear the pity in their voices when they talked.  Was it my issue? Maybe but it was where I was at the time.

But it was later on the journey that I

I learned to trust a bit.

Reach out a bit.

And let a new person in.

Because the feeling of isolation is real and having a trusted friend or two can make all the difference in the world.  I am grateful that I trusted these friends and I am grateful to have them in my world. I know how hard it is to trust, I have been hurt too, but I equally know how hard it is to feel alone.

I wrote this because I wish someone would have told me to do this early in our journey.  To let someone in a bit, then a bit more.  Maybe these are words that someone could use today, I hope so.

I don’t need to see that I have 1,000,000 friends on a social media site, because I do know I have my wonderful few!  And for them, I am grateful.

My wish for you is to find yours few as well.

I wish everyone a peaceful week.

Michele Gianetti author of “I Believe In You: A Mother and Daughter’s Special Journey” and “Emily’s Sister”

 

 

 

 

 

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